Chicago Woman's Tearful Rant About Cicada Mega Swarms Goes Viral
Depending on where you live in the US, you might be just about knee-deep in cicadas right now (or you will be soon). OK, that's perhaps a bit of an exaggeration, but not by much. We've got a serious cicada situation on our hands.
This spring, two long-dormant cicada broods have at long last emerged from their subterranean sleep, releasing trillions of cicadas across the American South and parts of the Midwest. The Chicago metro area is one of the many areas currently undergoing a heavy cicada emergence. Unfortunately, Chicago woman Emi Rose Sneed has already had enough.
Donning an anti-cicada helmet made from a Whole Foods grocery bag, @emirosesneed sat in her car to record a tearful rant, as so many TikTokers have done before. Instead of crying over relationship issues or other interpersonal drama, though, Emi vented about the creepy cicada invasion that just took over her Windy City neighborhood.
"I've been sitting in my car for 25 minutes," Emi shared in her confessional. "I created a barrier because there's so many cicadas right now, and I just, like, don't wanna leave my car, but I have to get to my house."
While cicadas are harmless, their unnerving appearance and the sheer numbers of them currently swarming certain areas have proven terrifying for serious entomophobes like Emi. Even armed with her grocery bag helmet and an umbrella, Emi still dreaded making the mad dash from her car to the front door through a cloud of cicadas.
"I don't think people understand, like, it's not just a fear, it's like, an actual phobia," Emi tearfully explained. "...Everything is just, like, really freaking me out."
In her caption, Emi revealed that she was thinking about taking the nuclear option: "Genuinely contemplating getting an Airbnb in Europe for a month bc [sic] I'm literally so over this." I mean, it's as good of a time for a summer vacation abroad as any...
Everyone's Sick of Cicadas
Emi's bizarre but heartfelt rant quickly went viral on TikTok. As amusing as parts of this video were (Emi even had to laugh at her ridiculous get-up right after saying her situation was "not funny"), the cicada swarms have proven tough for people living in the affected areas, especially those with phobias as bad as Emi's.
"You are 1000% me, girl I am pathologically terrified of insects, especially flying ones," @veri.vidi.vici related. "It's not a maturity thing, it's real, and cicadas are SWARMING. OMG I hope you made it."
"I wanted to roll my eyes, but if you swapped out the cicadas for those giant flying roaches people from FL call palmetto bugs, I'd 100% never leave my house," admitted @mandys0302.
In hindsight, the only genuinely ridiculous thing from the video was the improvised Whole Foods bag helmet, and even then, commenters like @planetyaya suggested helpful alternatives: "Bestie, buy a beekeeper hat!!! Cheap on Amazon and completely covers your face & creates some distance between you and them. Saved me big time last cicada invasion."
Facts About Cicadas
I know that logic can't always conquer an intense irrational fear. I have archnophobia, and despite knowing what little danger most spiders pose to me, I still can't stand 'em. But for what it's worth, here are a few comforting facts about cicadas:
According to the EPA, cicadas don't bite or sting, posing no threat to humans or pets. Unlike certain insects like locusts or Mormon crickets, they won't ruin gardens or crops, either. In fact, they can actually provide some environmental benefits, both as a food source for birds and wildlife, and by aerating lawns that they dig into!
Still, those facts are likely small comfort if you can't even walk through your neighborhood without getting slapped by cicadas. Fortunately, according to NBC Chicago, cicadas only live for about four weeks post-emergence, meaning that the affected Chicago neighborhoods should calm down again by mid-June.
Hang in there, Emi. If all else fails, there's a European Airbnb somewhere out there waiting for you.
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